


we both know a break does exactly what it says on the tin

by nosecoffee



Category: Riverdale (TV 2017)
Genre: AU, Angst, Childhood Friendship, Getting Together, He could murder me and I'd say thanks, Hurt/Comfort, Jughead's a bit of a jerk in this one, M/M, OCD, Repetition, Sorry guys, break ups, i honestly don't know what to tag, i still love him, poor archie
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-12
Updated: 2017-03-12
Packaged: 2018-10-03 01:17:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,241
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10232429
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nosecoffee/pseuds/nosecoffee
Summary: When Jughead moves in, he says he feels safe there, in Archie's house, because he knows they'll never get robbed because Archie got up to check if he locked the door ten times. Jughead closes his eyes as Archie flicks the lights on and off, and whispers on the edge of sleep that it feels like it's going night to day, ever so quickly, one after the other.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Title from 'Sick of Losing Soulmates' by Dodie Clark
> 
> If I have misrepresented OCD in any way, let me know so that I can fix it, because I don't want to be disrespectful or anything.
> 
> Credit for inspiration, and some themes for this fic, goes to Niel Hillborn, for his slam poem from 2013, entitled, simply, OCD.

Sometimes, Archie lies in bed, stares at the ceiling, and he can't go to sleep, because he keeps thinking, did I lock the door? Did I lock the door? Did I lock the door? He gets up to check seven times, and then he has to get up three more times, because it has to be a whole number, otherwise he'll spend the rest of the night obsessing over it until he eventually gets up to make it a whole number.

The first time Archie sees Jughead, they are in preschool, and he is four, and he still doesn't know why he's so nuts about certain things. The first time he sees Jughead Jones the Third, his mind goes quiet, and that's not normal, because usually his mind is a swirling repetitive mess of if he picked up his lunch, or if the way he kissed his mother on the cheek was right, or if he locked his bedroom window. When Archie sees him, his mind goes quiet, and he thinks he has to talk to him, has to say hello, has to wipe that eyelash off of his cheek, because his face is symmetrical in every other way and there's an eyelash on his cheek, and it's driving Archie insane.

He asks him to be his best friend three times, and Jughead says yes, but Archie can't leave it at three, so he asks him out two more times, to make it a whole number, to see if the other two are more perfect than the prior three.

On their first play date, Archie spends more time sorting his food into colour order than he does eating, or actually talking to Jughead, but Jughead doesn't seem to care. He just doesn't, because he seems to like him.

When Archie walks him home, to the Sunnydale trailer park, he stops thirty times to pull up his socks so that they match exactly in height.

It's years later, too many for Archie to count without his head hurting, but now they're in their senior year of high school, and he's at a party, holding a red solo cup, and he has his back pressed into the wall do that no one will ask him to dance with them.

This time, when Archie sees Jughead, his mind goes absolutely silent, in a way it hasn't since the first day of preschool, on the day Archie met him, with an eyelash on his cheek. Archie's mind, so full of thoughts like, had he picked up the right cup or how many lights are on or if he locked the door when he went out, disappear, and there is only Jughead leaning on the door jamb in a room in Cheryl Blossom's house, at a party she's throwing. There's no eyelash on Jugheads cheek.

Archie asks him out three times, and Jughead says yes, mouth curling in a tell-tale sign of a smile emerging, says yes twice, but Archie can't leave it at three, so he asks him out two more times, to make it a whole number, to see if the other two are more perfect than the prior three.

On their first date, Archie spends more time pulling apart his burger sorting the bits into colour order than he does eating, or actually talking to Jughead, but Jughead doesn't care. He just doesn't, because he's used to it and he knows this is what Archie does, and he eats his burger with an actual smile.

When Archie walks Jughead home, to the trailer park, he stops twenty five times to count the cracks on the sidewalk, and picks a flower out of one of them so that they all match. Archie gives Jughead the flower.

Jughead has a falling out with his family, after his mother leaves with his little sister under her arm, and Archie invites him to stay.

When Jughead moves in, he says he feels safe there, in Archie's house, because he knows they'll never get robbed because Archie got up to check if he locked the door ten times. Jughead closes his eyes as Archie flicks the lights on and off, and whispers on the edge of sleep that it feels like it's going night to day, ever so quickly, one after the other.

Archie kisses him goodbye fifteen times, trying to find the perfect kiss, and Jughead doesn't mind, his smile curling at the edges as he says 'I love you' at the door.

Things begin to change and it drives Archie insane.

Archie stops to look at the cracks on the sidewalk, but Jughead keeps walking.

Archie gets up to check the door again and when he comes back Jughead's rolled over.

Jughead tells Archie to stop playing with the lights and come to bed.

His lips are a straight line after the fourth kiss.

He mutters 'I love you' from the corner of his mouth.

Jughead goes back to live with his dad, despite the way Archie begs and cries and pleads with him not to, and leaves Archie alone, in a house still so full of his stuff, but no Jughead to complete it, and he starts putting things in boxes so that he has something to do with his new time, so that Archie won't call for the fiftieth time, knowing there will be no answer, so that he doesn't have to look at this collection of things that is incomplete because Jughead's not here.

Archie misses Jughead in a way he's never missed anything before. Because doesn't Jughead get it? There's no one else like him, no one else who'll put up with Archie the way he does, no one like him at all. There are no other fish in the sea, and if Jughead leaves for good, doesn't come back, cuts Archie out of his life like Archie's some kind of poison, Archie's so afraid that he might drown in loneliness.

There's no one else for Archie.

He misses Jughead, and the way he hums as he brushes his teeth, and then goes ahead and wipes the mirror down so that there's no toothpaste flecks for Archie to stay up all night rubbing at, like Lady MacBeth, and that damn spot.

Misses Jughead, and the way he orders precisely the right pizza, and precisely the right topping, and crust, and drinks, at the right time.

Misses Jughead, and the way he turns the knob in the shower like he's methodically opening a safe.

There's no one else. Love seemed like a physical impossibility to Archie before Jughead, because before Jughead, OCD was just imagining germs on his skin, and forgetting if he locked the door, or turned off the light, or wiped down the mirror.

With Jughead, OCD is watching his mouth curl at the corner when he gets up for the twentieth time to check if the door is locked.

Archie misses him so much, misses his near-symmetrical face, and the eyelash on his cheek.

Misses Jughead so much that he leaves the door unlocked, even though it makes him toss and turn, and fist the sheets in his hand, because if Archie doesn't he'll launch himself out of bed and lock the door and call him again, knowing there will be no answer.

Misses Jughead so much Archie leaves the lights on, just in case Jughead comes back.

Just in case Jughead changes his mind for the hundredth time.

Fin.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading, I hope you enjoyed this. If you did, please feel free to leave a comment and/or a kudos, and track me down on Tumblr @nose-coffee. Again, thank you.


End file.
